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If you want to leave a message after the tone Then speak clearly and I'll call you when I'm home Just say your words and say your name Leave the time and date you called And I'll get back to you Unless you're completely a boring old fart If you want to leave a message after the tone And darling, please forgive me, I'm not home I'm out shopping or trying to buy a dress So please leave your message, unless you're in distress Please leave a message after the tone I'm so sorry this is taking me so long I hope you're not calling from Australia Or far from Singapore Or this whole thing is costing you a fortune As well as being a bore (sobbing) Leave a message, please leave me a message after the tone Because ... alright I am! I am home! I am, I am, I am! I'm locked up in the bathroom all alone Please leave a-me a message after the tone. From Letras Mania