Mecca Normal

Family Swan
Golden-eyed pigeons fly in pairs grey squeaklings linking space "Swans mate for life," the old git on the news turns to the camera for the last word "life" Even the wizened are media-savvy Swan families sticking their beaks mounted on long thin necks into other family members' business the sickness of one means the rest won't go to fill their swan-bellies No they'll stick together floating around until the poison kills That bullet was outlawed years ago lead shell-casings litter the area The damaging quotient can't be picked up can't be totally removed with even the best of the finest-toothed combs Letras de canciones He was a family-swan dead bit the bullet heavy head hanging on a long limp neck "It's hard on your mother It's hard on your mother, you know." In my head I say (yes, you are hard on my mother) He wants to shout out (you're killing your mother!) (you're killing your mother!) Family-man tried to down a bottle of pills Family-mother had to get farm-woman from next-door to come and get the pills out of his mouth Flipping him over, cursing pulling out the fringe of a rug caught in the vacuum cleaner his lips tightened over dissolving pills white, cream, blue pills tiny logos carved into them tiny logos carved in the dissolving pills "Are you trying to kill your mother?" That was his crazy cry when at twelve I got caught playing nicky-knocky-nine-doors Seemed absurd Mother passed us in the hall heading for her hot bath for the first time I noticed and wondered why a woman's ass is wider than a man's Foolishly I'd asked "How did mom get cancer?" Turned out I was to blame The answer: "Having a child later in life and not breast feeding caused the cancer." Oh, bitter pill Oh, bullet with a name on it a tiny message carved into it a tiny message carved in my dissolving heart I think I'll go to my room now and set a spell please pass the smelling salts When I moved away from their madness Family-mother put on her tweed going-to-the-doctor suit and came to my little attic apartment She didn't say hello to my boyfriend sitting on the edge of my bed she was there to inform me that I would have to move home my leaving had affected her sleep Oh, now she's eighty, she has terrible nightmares I prompt her to reveal them and I learn that she's integrating me into the disasters she sees on TV Family-man tells me a million terrible things all at once one after another my stature decreases I become short and ugly again Oh, my voice is hollow small I can't do anything right I am worthless hanging on to blame My thinking forms awkward words to be twisted and thrown back in my tiny 41-year-old face Family-man sets me straight ‘Your mother is going to live another twenty years she's going to live to 100.' Family-man rants, family-man gets confused "She's going to live another 100 years." Oh, I wish he'd make up his mind I wish he'd make up his mind either I'm killing her or she's never going to die Family-man tells me a million terrible things all at once one after another Family-man sets me straight From Letras Mania