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Ed Gruberman: Hey, you! Is this where you join the Canadian armed forces?Recruiter: This is the Recruitment Center. Would you like to enlist?Ed Gruberman: Do you have guns?Recruiter: Yes, we do.Ed Gruberman: I'm in!Recruiter: Well done, welcome aboard. First the paperwork. Name?Ed Gruberman: Ed. Ed Gruberman. I can't wait to boot some head!Recruiter: All right. Well, would you like Army, Navy, or Air Force?Ed Gruberman: Who has the most guns?Recruiter: Uh, Army.Ed Gruberman: I want Army.Recruiter: Okay! Now which course would you like?Ed Gruberman: Courses?Letras de cancionesRecruiter: Yes, to learn a career.Ed Gruberman: I don't want a career, I want a gun. I want a biiiig gun!Recruiter: Everyone wants a free education. It's our incentive to enlist. Now, pick three from this pamphlet.Ed Gruberman: "Introduction to International Politics"? "Computers 101"? "Antique Restoration"?Recruiter: Yes, that qualifies you to work on our helicopters.Ed Gruberman: Look! Don't you have any courses with guns?Recruiter: Well, yes. Last page.Ed Gruberman: "Intro to Ammo"? "Advanced Wounding"? "Creative Bazookas"?! Ooh, ooh! I'll take all these!Recruiter: Fine. Uh, any mental diseases or physical deformities?Ed Gruberman: Okay, I'll take paranoia, three nipples, and uh--Recruiter: No no no no. I mean--Ed Gruberman: What? Oh.Recruiter: Nev-never mind. Would you like in on the pension plan?Ed Gruberman: No.Recruiter: Christmas club?Ed Gruberman: No!Recruiter: King or Queen size?Ed Gruberman: Look, I want a gun! I want to kill people!Recruiter: What, who?Ed Gruberman: Uh, Afghanis.Recruiter: We're not at war with them.Ed Gruberman: We will be after I start killin' em!Recruiter: No, we don't kill people.Ed Gruberman: Not even Al Qaeda?Recruiter: Oh, no no no. They're dangerous. We don't want to get them angry.Ed Gruberman: What a wimp!Recruiter: I'm not a wimp! I'm EXTREMELY tough. I do advanced Pilates.Ed Gruberman: You're a wimp! Have you shot anyone lately?Recruiter: Well, the Canadian Army isn't about shooting people. It's about career training and being all you can be on a limited budget.Ed Gruberman: I want to bathe in a geyser of enemy blood!Recruiter: That hardly sounds sanitary.Ed Gruberman: SCREW sanitary! I want to blow things up like in "Shaving Ryan's Privates"!Recruiter: No no, no. The-the movie was "Saving Private Ryan".Ed Gruberman: What movie?Recruiter: Look-- I--Ed Gruberman: What?Recruiter: What? I--Ed Gruberman: Look, let me explode a few buildings!Recruiter: No!Ed Gruberman: One stab wound!Recruiter: No, our insurance rate will go up.Ed Gruberman: What are you, a bunch of girls?!Recruiter: NO! Well, ek-except for the girls.Ed Gruberman: There's GIRLS in the army?!Recruiter: And they're just as tough as the men.Ed Gruberman: So they don't shoot anyone either, huh?Recruiter: Well, that's not what we do!Ed Gruberman: Wimp! What DO you do?Recruiter: Peacekeeping.Ed Gruberman: Wimp.Recruiter: Border patrol.Ed Gruberman: Wimp.Recruiter: Parades.Ed Gruberman: Wimp!Recruiter: Typing.Ed Gruberman: Wimp!Recruiter: Filing.Ed Gruberman: WIMP!Recruiter: That does it! Get out of here before I do something!Ed Gruberman: Oh, I'm real scared! What are you gonna do, file me out?Recruiter: Uh, wait-wait a minute. Just what are you doing here anyway?Ed Gruberman: I told you! I want a gun, I want a lot of guns, I want to start killing anyone I disagree with!Recruiter: Oh-ho. Oh, you want the AMERICAN army.Ed Gruberman: Oh, okay, thank you. Bye-bye!TRX is online now Reply With Quote From Letras Mania