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FZ: And now folks, it's time for Don Pardo to deliver ourspecial Illinois Enema Bandit-type announcement. Take itaway, Don!Don Pardo: This is a true story about a famous criminal fromright around Chicago. This is the story of Michael Kenyon, aman who's serving time at this very moment for the crime ofarmed robbery. It so happens, that at the time of theserobberies, Michael decided to give his female victims alittle enema—apparently, there was no law against that.But his name lives on—Michael Kenyon, THE ILLINOIS ENEMABANDIT!The Illinois Enema BanditI heard he's on the looseI heard he's on the looseLord, the pitiful screamsOf all them college-educated women . . .He'd just be tyin' 'em up(They'd be all bound down!)Just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fullaThe Illinois Enema Bandit JuiceHe just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bagfullaThe Illinois Enema Bandit JuiceHe just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bagfullaLetras de cancionesThe Illinois Enema Bandit JuiceHe just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bagfullaThe Illinois Enema Bandit JuiceThe Illinois Enema BanditI heard it on the newsI heard it on the newsBloomington Illinois . . . he has caused some alarmJust sneakin' around thereFrom farm to farmHe's got a rubberized bagAnd a hose on his armLookin' for some rustic co-ed rumpThat he just might wanna pumpLookin' for some rustic co-ed rumpThat he just might wanna pumpLookin' for some rustic co-ed rumpThat he just might wanna pumpThe Illinois Enema BanditOne day he'll have to paySome day he'll have to payThe police will say, "You're under arrest!"And the judge would have him for a special guestThen the D.A. will order a secret testStuff his pudgy little thumbs in the side of his vestThen they'll put out a call-yooou! for the jury folks(That's you over there)And the judge would say, "No poo-poo jokes!"Then they'll drag in the bandit for all to see,Sayin' "Don't nobody, no no, have no sympathy . . .HOT SOAPY WATER in the FIRST DEGREE!"And then the Bandit might say, "Why is everybody lookin' atme?"DID YOU CAUSE THIS MISERY?WELL DID YOU CAUSE THIS KINDA MISERY?WELL DID YOU CAUSE THIS MISERY?Well, one girl shout: "Let the Bandit be!"BANDIT ARE YOU GUILTY?BANDIT ARE YOU GUILTY?TELL ME NOW, WHAT'S YOUR PLEA?Another girl shout: "Let the fiend go free!"ARE YOU GUILTY? BANDIT, DID YOU DO THESE DEEDS?COME ON, NOWHe said, "It must be just what they all need . . . ""It must be just what they all need . . . "(That's right!)"It must be just what they all need . . . "(Over there)"It must be just what they all need . . . "(Help me out now!)"It must be just what they all need . . . "(That's right)"It must be just what they all need . . . "He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bagfulla"Don't you know it must be just what they all need . . . "(That's it!)He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bagfulla"It must be just what they all need . . . "He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bagfulla"It must be just what they all need . . . "He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bagfulla"It must be just what they all need . . . "He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bagfulla"Don't you know it must be just what they all need . . . "The Illinois Enema Bandit JuiceHe just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bagfulla"It must be just what they all need . . . "The Illinois Enema Bandit JuiceHe just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bagfulla"It must be just what they all need . . . "The Illinois Enema Bandit JuiceHe just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bagfulla"It must be just what they all need . . . "The Illinois Enema Bandit JuiceHe just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bagfullaThe Illinois Enema Bandit JuiceHe just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bagfullaThe Illinois Enema Bandit JuiceHe just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bagfullaThe Illinois Enema Bandit JuiceHe just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bagfullaThe Illinois Enema Bandit JuiceHe just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bagfullaThe Illinois Enema Bandit JuiceHe just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bagfullaThe Illinois Enema Bandit JuiceHe just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bagfullaThe Illinois Enema Bandit JuiceHe just be . . . hey!Talkin' bout the Illinois . . .Illinois . . .Ain't talkin' 'bout Fontana . . . ha . . .Ain't talkin' 'bout Po-head-otated . . . ha . . .(I'll try again . . .)Potato Headed BobbyTalkin' 'bout the Illinois Enema BanditYeah yeah yeahFZ: Wait a minute, this is for Roy Estrada, wherever he'sWanna-wanna-wannanenemaAn enemaWanna-wanna-wannanenemaAn enemaI wanna-wanna-wannanenemaEh . . .Take it away!The Illinois Enema Bandit(The Enema Bandit)The Enema Bandit(The Enema Bandit)The Enema BanditTalkin' bout the Illinois Enema Bandit . . .(. . . It can't happen here!)Juice!FZ: Awright-awright! Ray White, the assistant Illinois EnemaBandit, live on stage here in New York . . .! That's it . .. sit right down and make yourselves comfortable . . . From Letras Mania