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Dear incredible Rolf Harris I woke up this morning feeling awfully embarresed This is my 26th letter and you still have no responded Its not my fault that my thoughts have been bombared my your indescribable ways Your connection with music I have your signature on my wall so I never, ever lose it I will never forget your didgeridoo I'm learning it still and I've scraped a Grade 2 It sounds so earthy though I'm not as good as you I'm gonna double up my lessons so I can be just like you I was in a band, so I can understand What its like to be a struggling musician Hard to get your word out on the streets when nobody will listen Letras de cancionesI play the keyboard I'm Grade 6 Mum calls me Stevie Wonder Its a bit embarrissing I love playing the keyboard I love Stevie Wonder too But I love you more Stevie's shit compared to you You've made me vegatarian After all your animal shows Its actually rather easy But a bit awkward at home Mum won't cook anything without a creature in it She can't give me an apple without rubbing a bit of meat around it I said 'Mum I don't eat that, I'm veggie like Rolf' She said 'Stop being so bloody difficult and do as you are told' I adore your artwork I've won some pieces at some auctions I've got a big book at home - some of my own imitations Of your excellent work I sometimes draw my friends Sometimes we all dress up and I play you for pretend I wish I was you I can dance you know I could be everything about you Except for the beard Cos...obviously well...I'm a women and well that would just be wierd Saying that, I have seen them In fancy dress shops Theres one on my highstreet I pop in quite a lot But I digress Its not about jokes If it was a beard I was after I'd like other blokes But they aren't all-round artists! And like I've said I've captured all my friends as cartoons as caricatures They all say 'Yeah Rolfs are good, but his aren't as good as yours' Oh and lookie here I'm not the only one to notice your so great You've got a personal call to paint a royal portrait And there you are As quick as jack sticks to show off your art Up to bloody Buckingham to paint the ageing tart! 26 times, Rolf, I've written to you You've had your chance but now it has fled Seems you think I was better off dead You still won't paint me after all I've said? I tie myself kangaroo down sport instead From Letras Mania