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EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!LAO ZU! SUN TSU! AND CONFUCUIOUS!VERSUS!NEITZCSCHE! SOCRATES! AND VOLTAIRE!BEGIN! W SIm coming off the acropolys to start some pandemonium!Dont bring limp raps to a pimp slap symposeum!The mad gadfly, philosophy was my invention! N:Rolling with the flyest nihlist Vand me, their French Henchman NWe got the wisdom Vand the wit SLetras de cancionesthat even I couldnt question VDropping western medicine All:on these East Infections! NIts evident Vyou've never been All:our type of mental bretherenWe're better Nspeakers All:better Sthinkers All:better V:lovers All:better men! E CThis type of arrogance is sure to be expectedFrom men who speak of wisdom with no clue of what respect is! L:You westerners are sloppy, needing dicipline in lifeYou lack control of yourselves and of the mic Sun:While we use percise strikes to disrupt your concentration C:Hand you an ass whooping our decendants will honor for generations SunWe built a nation Lwith patience Sunand the presence C:for living L:And you'll never hold a candle to the Cwisdom Lwe've All:written W NOh, ill give you something you can bow and kowtow toWhen I squat down and squeeze out a Tao of Pooh on Lao Zu!You need to take control of the life you're givenCall me Ubermench, 'cause im so driven! VAnd im a freethinker so confromting conformists like you? Its my job!Got a sharp wit like a pick that'll skewer you like a confunios-kabob!OH! You flubbed the machine, im beating your submissive ass into submissionDishing out more disses than letters, pamphlets and plays ive been publishing! S:Now that we covered the two Yin and Yang twins, I can move onto Jackie ChanSun Tzu ill be picking apart your Wu with my Mehtod, Man!This seminal general isnt so tough on the mic, all your men must be like "yo, what happened?"You're pittifully lyrically, lucky for history you didnt author the art of rapping! E Sun:Bitch, I wrote the art of war so you better get your guns outThese white boys getting burned, 'cause guess what? Now the suns outAsians spitting sick, but no this isnt SARSLao Ziick the beat! Confucious drop some bars! C:Let me be candide with you, VoltaireFrench dip with the egg noodle hairYour ego's just so distractingFree speech doesnt mean just keep yapping!And you killed God so i gotta askDid he die of shame when he made your moustache?OH! You tried to plant a new German Psyche But you just grew hate: Me no Third Reichy Sun:And it all starts with YOU! You're the father, Socrates!Honestly? I think you owe both of your students here an apology! W NI wouldnt exactly call myself a student of this plebe!Dont make nietcsche come over and put a knee up in your chi!'Cause im N-I-E-T-C-S-C-H-E!And ill end any motherfucker like my name in a spelling bee! SPlebe bitch?! Im toxic like a hemlock sip!So hang a sandle on the door, 'cause you can suck Soc's dick! V:Sacreblu, Socrates! You're making things a little tenseCome, lets blind these Chinese hynies with some shiny bright Enlightenment SI will NOT be taught comraderie from a frog who rigged the lottery!You make a mockery of ethics so keep your fat nose in your coffee! VLet me Be Frank, dont start beef with THE FrankWho hangs with B. Franks giving ladies Beef franks! E Sun:I have turned them on themselves, their chaos is our oppertunity! L:We must remember: A bowl is most useful when it is empty Sun:UGH, Lao Zi, I dont mean no disrespectBut you need to fill your bowl with shit that makes some sense! L:Oh, you dont wanna stand in the path of Lao Zu todayIll make you move, bitch. Get out the way! C:Yo, where in the tradition of rap battles is it writtenThat two dudes on the same team should squabble like some clucking chickens? Sun:Conficious, you always trying to put something in its placeWhy dont you tell your eyebrows they need to fit better on your face? C:Okay, I see, you wanna make it like that?Ill knock your warmongering head out of that to go box hat!Here's the real golden rule: Im way above you weak rookiesConficious say: You cna all hold these fortune cookies! WHAT IS WINNING?WHO IS NEXT?YOU DECIDE!EPIC! QUIET!RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY! From Letras Mania